In Beautiful Malice (I told you that book sticks with me – don’t worry, I will try my best to not be spoilery here), the main character hides who she truly is. She has her reasons–she wants to put her old life behind her and doesn’t want everyone to know what happened in her past. I get that. Then there’s Alice. Charming, volatile Alice. She is really not who she says she is (I won’t say more than that, because that really would ruin something).
When I first read the book, despite how much I loved it, I couldn’t help but thinking, can someone really be that duplicitous? I had a hard time wrapping my mind around how someone could seem to the people closest to her to be one person, but in reality be someone else.
You know what’s weird about when you doubt something? Life has this strange tendency to find a way (often unpleasant) to let you know, hey, it’s true, that kind of stuff really DOES happen in real life.
About a week and a half after I finished reading Beautiful Malice, I got my confirmation that people really can be just as two-sided as Alice was. Here’s the story:*
***
A few years ago, I was really close friends with this person. We did nearly everything together, and I could probably count the days in a six month period that we didn’t see each other on one hand. I knew this person inside and out. Or so I thought.
Recently I learned that this old friend of mine did something terrible. Like, really, really, makes-you-ill-to-hear-about-it terrible. And it wasn’t a one-time slip-up (though, honestly, I don’t think those exist in a case like this); it was something that had been going on for years. And nobody know. On the outside, this person was still the same wonderful, charming, fun person I knew back then. But beneath the person everyone saw, there was another, completely different person. A person who could do things that the person I knew never would. And even though the two of us have not been friends for four years, it still really made me question a lot about our friendship and my ability to see people for who they are.
My first thoughts–after the initial shock–were along the lines of what has changed? How could the person I knew have changed into this other person in the few years since we were so close? The more I thought about it, though, the more I realized that I don’t know that this old friend of mine has really changed. On the surface, people still saw the person I knew. There wasn’t a different person there as far as anyone–even those closest to this person–could tell.
After realizing this, my thought process changed. Now I wonder how long? How long has this person been living a lie? How could I not tell what was going on beneath the surface in all the time we were together? I know I shouldn’t beat myself up about it–I mean, everyone else was fooled by the same act that fooled me. But at the same time, I can’t help it. I guess I am still just in a little bit of shock.
In the end though, one thing I do know is that Rebecca James got it right when she wrote Beautiful Malice. People like Alice really do exist. This is not a comforting thought.
***
*Yeah, so I tried to keep the story as ambiguous as possible while still getting my point across. Maybe I just made a confusing mess of what I was trying to say. If so, sorry about that. I just didn’t want to spell out details about what happened. Many of my readers already know who and what I am talking about (and many more of you can probably take a pretty close guess at the what based on what I wrote), but I feel no need to be specific.
8 Comments
Rest assured, your bubba is who he says he is!
Okay…that one I do know!
a cyborg. Don’t act like you’re surprised. Anyways, while some people are just exceptional at wearing masks, I think some people develop an ability to split themselves down the middle. I wouldn’t call one life a lie and another the truth, but rather two halves of the truth. Sometimes part of one life will slip into the other, and we notice more than we realize. You spend time around somebody, and despite them acting like they always do, something is just slightly off. We tend to shrug at the slightly off and forget it in short order.
Great insight, friend! I think you are totally right about that, and think that is probably what happened here. I don’t think anyone could have worn a mask as well as this person did. And if something was ever just a little bit off, I wouldn’t have thought anything of it–people get in funks, and I probably would have justified it as that.
Also, you are right: I think maybe Bubba IS a cyborg. That would explain the overheating problem he has. Perhaps I should replace his fans.
The Incubus picture is neat. I could still beat him up, though.
I am thinking you are right about that one too!
I’ve thought about this a lot recently (and I haven’t read the book yet). I don’t have any answers, really. I think there’s good and bad in all of us and that some wonderful people are REALLY good at hiding their weaknesses/bad spots. And the flip side, some “wicked” people have redeeming, wonderful qualities that are overshadowed by the heinous things they’ve done.