Or, Why small towns are kinda cool.
So, yeah. There’s a new movie hitting theatres tonight at midnight. Perhaps you’ve heard of it? I won’t even lie: I am pretty excited to go see it. I am even more excited that it is opening because that means I am done dealing with it at work, though. Because of The Twilight Saga: Eclipse, this is what my morning looked like:
(Ahem…this might be a little vent-y. And Ramble-y. And whatever-y. Read at your own risk.)
8:25AM:
The phone rings. I have barely been in the office ten minutes, so I am still trying to get things set up for the day. Nobody ever calls this early (Hollywood doesn’t wake up until after 9:00 my time), so I know it is a problem. I answer.
FRANTIC THEATER OWNER: I just got to my theatre, and I don’t have Eclipse yet, and ohmygosh! I have to have this movie!
YOURS TRULY: Okay. I will call your film shipper and see where it’s at. I will call you back in 5 minutes.
I hang up on the poor man and immediately dial his film shipper. They explain what is going on. I call the theatre owner back.
YT: You can relax. Your truck is just running a little late. See, there was this fire-
FTO: Oh right. Yeah, I heard about the fire.
YT: you mean, you knew about this and are still freaking out?!?! Well, they had to shut some of their docks so the fire crew could work on the building next door. It slowed things down, but your print is on the truck on its way to you right now, okay?
FTO: Yeah! Thanks so much!
Crisis one: averted.
8:45AM:
I get another call. Again, it is pretty early for the phone to be ringing. This can’t be good.
SLIGHTLY-MORE-FRANTIC THEATRE OWNER: Hi. I, um, just got to my theatre, and my courier has been here, and we don’t have Eclipse yet, and I have a midnight show tonight, and I really have to have it!
YT: Okay, we’ve had some problems with this one already this morning. Let me call your shipper and I will track it down for you.
I hang up on another frantic theatre owner and call a film shipper (different shipper, as these theatres are in different states).
FILM SHIPPER: Yeah, we have his movie here. It is on the deck waiting for the truck to pick it up. He will get it in an hour or so.
Crisis two: averted.
9:10AM
The phone rings again. I figure it is someone from a film company calling about bookings or something. Oh how wrong I was.
PERFECTLY CALM THEATRE OWNER: Rachel? It looks like we don’t have Eclipse yet. Can you call and find out where it is?
YT: Of course! We have had a couple other theatres getting theirs late, so it is probably on its way. I will call you back in 5 minutes.
9:12AM
FILM SHIPPER: Um, so I looked in our system and it says that print is still in the depot. You might want to call Summit.
9:14AM
SUMMIT CASHIER: Yeah, I haven’t let that one go yet. The theatre needed to pay an advance on it, and we don’t have the money in the bank yet.
TY: WTF?!?! Why did you not tell me about this in time to get anything done?? Um, okay. I will call the theatre owner and get a wire transfer confirmation for you.
9:25AM
I send the wire transfer confirmation to Summit-the transfer was made well in advance, so there should be no problems at all.
SUMMIT CASHIER: Um, yeah. See how section 6 on this form is not filled out? I can’t do anything with this until section 6 is filled out.
YT: What? that part is what the bank fills out after the customer has left. These confirmations never have Section 6 filled out.
SC: . . .
YT: Okay, okay. I will have the owner go back to the bank and ask them to dig up the completed form from last week. (At this point I am trying my absolute hardest to still be calm with this cashier. He is just doing his job, after all.)
10:00AM
I send another wire transfer confirmation.
SUMMIT CASHIER: Um, yeah. This is all filled out and everything, but the money is still not in my bank, so there is nothing I can do.
YT: You couldn’t tell me that half an hour ago before we spent all this time tracking it down? Really? (Yeah, the calm was rapidly leaving.)
SC: Okay, tell you what. I will take this confirmation to the branch manager and see what I can get him to do.
YT: Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! You are the best. (Okay, so I start to feel a little bad for being rude to him. Oops.)
11:25AM
The branch manager finally calls. He asks to speak to my boss. I am more than happy to pass this whole ordeal off to him at this point. As he is trying his best bargaining tactics, I get another call.
MYSTERY CALLER: Hi, this is Mr. Branch President from Small Town Branch of a Big Name Bank in Middle-of-Nowhere, Wyoming.
YT: Um, hi?
Mr. BP: It seems we made a mistake here at the bank. See, last Friday we started this wire transfer for your theatre. Then, for some reason-I don’t know why-the transfer was reversed. So this is our fault, not the theatre owner’s.
At this point, my brain starts to short-circuit. I pass the call on to my boss, and I take the call from the Summit branch manager so I can explain to him what is going on now.
————
In the end, the print was released from the depot. Shortly after my brain exploded. But, our theatre has a midnight showing tonight, and by the time they released his movie, there wasn’t a courier out there that would get it to him in time. This is where the why small towns are kinda cool thing comes in.
The bank branch president down in Middle-of-Nowhere, WY felt really bad about the mess-up. He also knew that, given the demographics of his town, Eclipse will be the most successful movie they will have at that theatre this year (okay, so someone might have impressed that upon him 
). So, at 12:30PM, the bank president hopped in his car to drive the 4 hours to Salt Lake City, UT, pick up the movie, and drive the 4 hours back so the theatre could get it just in time to put it together and play a midnight show.
That wouldn’t happen in a big city. Yeah, small towns rock.
/rant
7 Comments
This sounds like your typical day from hell! Glad you survived!
Me too! Now you really have to go see it (not that I doubt you would
) or Dennis will be sad!
I started reading this thinking I was going to give you all the reasons small towns SUCK, but by the time I finished reading, I had no option but to agree with you. Good job!
That’s kind of cool that in the end the big-wig bank guy saved the day:) I can’t even imagine what your job must be like when huge movies release, but I like the descriptions. Kind of a behind-the-scenes feel. I will be seeing Eclipse tomorrow, but in boring old Great Falls, not middle of nowhere Idaho.
Actually, big releases are *usually* the easiest part of my job. It is when we have to get movies that are a couple weeks old, but still popular, to the tiny towns that causes a problem. Until Eclipse!
I love you (as a dearest of friends!!!! Please tell Bubba not to send his computer minions to slay me via there interweb-netic pathways of destruction. Tell the old fellow I’m quite partial to him as well.Thanks). This post hit my funny bone just right! I personally kind of miss smaller theaters. The twenty screen arenas of mayhem that exist out here can get on my nerves on occasion. Sorry your brain exploded. I hope, at the very least, it didn’t dribble out your ears afterwards. That can ruin a person’s day for sure.
I know! Brain on a new shirt is the WORST. I love little theatres. I might be partial to them because I book for so many of them, but I also just feel like I have better experiences at smaller theatres than I do at ginormous ones.
Don’t you worry. The computer minions are tucked safely in bed for the time being. Love you too, Buddy! We miss you over here in Montana.